Hi. I’m Michael. Welcome to my site.
In 1932, my grandmother had an affair. My grandfather (Wikipedia) not only divorced her, but went to court for custody of my mother. He was a retired Royal Air Force Wing Commander, twice decorated for bravery in the Great War; she was an adulteress. He won.
This emotionally destroyed my mother. The shame that her mother had abandoned her crippled her for life. There was a similar tale on my father’s side. As a sensitive child, thanks to epigenetic inheritance I inherited my parents’ unresolved feelings of abandonment and sexual shame.
I became a process analyst at the largest cannery in the southern hemisphere. I didn’t know it at the time, but process manufacturing is a very good model for understanding seemingly inconsistent human emotional behaviour in a consistent, structured way—what I term emotional mechanics.
I’ve written more about this in “Pipes everywhere” – how Process Manufacturing maps human emotions.
My career led from the cannery in New Zealand to an IT consultant for industrial and governmental clients in Asia, North America, and Britain. It was a high-income, high-consumption, high-carbon, high-porn lifestyle—and it was completely toxic.
Eventually, I hit the wall.
I began—unconsciously at first—to apply my analytical skills to my own emotionally toxic lifestyle. I discovered the “shambles” described by 1960s British counter-culture psychologist R.D. Laing:
“When our personal worlds are rediscovered… we discover first a shambles… genitals dissociated from heart; heart severed from head; heads dissociated from genitals.”
Healing this “shambles” took a quarter of a century, cost everything I had and more besides, and hurt beyond anything I could imagine. I hurt others too, for which I’m deeply regretful. Yet I eventually healed the shamed side of my being—my emotions and sexuality.
Learn more in this podcast: How Porn Addiction Ruined My Life by Michael H Hallett | The Afro Ndiritu Podcast. The title’s a bit dramatic, but I’m delighted to appear on Afro’s great podcast. Despite the topic, this is a humorous and wide-ranging talk about men’s wellbeing.
This led me into the world of education, where I became the Chair of Governors of my son’s primary school. In 2010 I was commissioned by the Thames Valley Police to create a primary school musical on the emotional roots of extreme behaviour. When Chemistry goes Bang! was staged at several schools in Milton Keynes.
In 2016 I partnered with the Milton Keynes Council to create Stepping Stones: building school capacity to resist radicalisation. This workshop was successfully delivered to local primary schools.
I was part of the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children’s ChildLine Schools Service, educating primary school children to recognise all forms of abuse. I also have an NCFE-certified Advanced (Level 4) Diploma in Life Coaching from Stonebridge College.
Bringing the unconscious to light
I’ve spent the last quarter of a century bringing the unconscious to light. I’ve healed deep damage and gained extraordinary insight into the human condition in general and badly wounded male sexuality in particular.
I found that the issues I faced were not only widespread but account for our environmentally, economically and—above all—emotionally unsustainable planet.
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
My passion is to help you empty your own unconscious with as much ease and grace as possible—which, admittedly, sometimes isn’t much. For the deeper we dig, the more our unconscious damage surfaces in our lives. I’ve made mistakes, acted inappropriately and hurt people I care about, which I deeply regret.
My aim is to empower people to recognise and release unconscious shame and trauma.
My vision is a world that’s free of shame, guilt, anxiety, addiction and all other forms of unconscious programming, destructive behaviours and trauma.
“Michael is obviously a deep thinker and this combined with his rollicking writing style makes for an easy and entertaining read without losing the wonderful depth of meaning he offers us.”
Joan Morgan McCarthy, author of Peace and Harmony: Reenvisioning Sexuality Education
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